Fake Felix
by insaneantics21
Summary: Ginny asks Harry for a couple drops of his Felix Felicis for unexpected reasons. Told from Harry's POV. Rated T for slight language and mentions of adult themes. Oneshot.


I have no idea what was going through my head when I wrote this. It makes me giggle a little bit though. I hope it makes you giggle, too.

* * *

You ever have one of those moments where you think something is going to happen and you're ready for it but then out of nowhere something completely unexpected happens? That happened to me a few days ago. It was a little bit humorous, actually.

There I am doing my Transfiguration essay for McGonagall and Ginny Weasley comes up to me. I know she's had a crush on me for years so I figure this will be another conversation of her trying to get me to go to Hogsmeade with her.

"Hey Harry can I ask you a really big favor?"

"I dunno, maybe."

"I need a couple drops of that Felix Felicis you got the other day."

"What? Why?"

"I've just got something I'm really nervous about doing and I figure a bit of luck will help me out. Come on, just a couple drops!"

"Ginny that stuff is really valuable, I was planning on saving it."

"Just a couple drops, Harry!"

If I had known what she wanted to do with it I would've given it to her right then and there, I swear it. At the time though I was sure she was trying to get me to go on a date with her. I didn't want to waste the good stuff so I quickly came up with a plan.

"I'll think about it, okay Ginny? Meet me here tomorrow night."

"Okay."

She sulked off, sure I wasn't going to give it to her. I'm not that cruel though. I swiped an empty vile from potions the next day and filled it with water, she wouldn't know the difference. I waited in the common room that night, it was a bit crowded. Hermione was sitting on the couch fighting with Ron about who the hell knows what, like they always do. I'm sure it had something to do with Lavender Brown but I didn't really care and it's not important.

"Hey Harry," Ginny said. She appeared out of nowhere and sat down across the table from me.

"Hey Gin."

She glanced over her shoulder at Ron and Hermione who were now on separate ends of the couch. Hermione looked up at her and I saw Ginny smile and go red. I'm a guy though…I was pretty oblivious as to what was going on in that moment.

"So I made a decision," I said, turning her attention back to me.

"Look, it's okay if you don't want to. I understand."

"Would you let me talk? You can have a couple drops, all right?"

I handed her the vile of water over to her and she grinned. It was slightly evil. She uncorked it and took a small drink and handed it back to me.

"It has no taste," she said.

"Really? I've never tasted it so I don't know. How do you feel?"

"I feel…really good. Yeah. Um…" she looked over her shoulder to the couch again. "Thanks!"

If you had told me the day before what was going to happen in that moment I would've laughed at you. Really, I would have.

Ginny got up from the table and walked over, standing in front of and over Hermione. She grabbed Hermione's book, parchment and quill and slung it off her lap and onto the floor.

"Ginny! What the hell!?" Hermione shrieked.

Ginny crawled up onto Hermione's lap and straddled her. She slipped her fingers through Hermione's hair, leaned in…and well…she kissed her. It was more of an attack, really. I waited for the moment when Hermione would pull out her wand and stun the hell out of Ginny…I waited…and I waited some more. I realized it wasn't going to happen when I saw Hermione's hands slip into Ginny's back pockets and grab hold of Ginny's backside.

Ron started yelling. Ginny's hands left Hermione's hair long enough to grab her wand out of her pocket and body-bind her brother. When she pushed Hermione onto her back on the couch and pounced again I briefly wondered if I should remind them that they were in the middle of the common room and there were about a dozen people watching. I didn't. Neither did anyone else.

It wasn't until Ginny started attempting to strip off Hermione's shirt that Hermione came to her senses and sat up, knocking Ginny to the floor. I won't lie to you, I was disappointed. Hermione looked around and pulled Ginny up from the floor and to the portrait hole. I kind of wanted to follow them; I figured I deserved that much, having been the one that gave Ginny the fake Felix that gave her the confidence to start the whole thing. I think Ron would've killed me though. He hated the thought of anyone dating his little sister, he'd probably kill anyone who tried to spy on her. It was then that I realized he was still body-bound on the floor. I let him out of it and he looked around for the pair. I told him they left. He turned purple.

I must've fallen asleep at some point because it wasn't until one in the morning, almost four hours later, that the portrait creaked open and I saw Hermione and Ginny come through. Ginny was giggling incessantly, Hermione was shushing her. Ginny's belt was undone, Hermione's shirt was buttoned wrong, and if that wasn't bad enough Ginny's hair was almost as frizzy as Hermione's.

"Shhhh, Ginny! Do you want to wake everyone in the entire tower?!"

"Let 'em hear! If I could go up to the owlry I'd shout it out to the whole world that I just had absolutely fantastic sex with the most gorgeous girl in Hogwarts…in three different classrooms!"

"Ginny!" Hermione squealed. "You know, if you hadn't been so loud then we could've just stayed in the Astronomy tower…"

"I'm pretty sure my favorite was the Transfiguration classroom though…"

"I've got to agree, when you…Oh my God, Harry!"

Okay so I'll admit, I was kind of hiding a little bit to see where that conversation went. Obviously it didn't work.

"I…uh…sorry…"

"How much of that did you hear?"

"Not enough," I blurted out. Hermione gasped. Ginny laughed.

"Thanks for everything, Harry," Ginny looked at me and smiled. She slipped an arm around Hermione's waist and Hermione nodded in agreement.

"It was all you, Gin. The real stuff is still in my room. I gave you water. Now please, continue the conversation!"

It's been a week. I still have the bruise from Ginny punching me in the arm before the two of them ran to the dormitories. Every time they leave the common room together (which has been every single night) Ron mumbles something about "sex like rabbits". I don't really listen to him. I just smile and laugh at the fact that I know his little sister and our best friend have had sex on the desk he sits at in Charms. Yes, I still hide in the common room when they come through the portrait hole. I'm a horny teenage boy, okay? Get the hell over it. Now if you'll excuse me, they should be back any minute now and I need to get my Invisibility Cloak.


End file.
